Høng-Crewet
40k Jokes
Jeg stødte tilfældigt på et andet forum, hvor der er en post fyldt med 40k jokes
http://forums.filefront.com/table-top-hobby-discussion/271841-warhammer-jokes.html
Der er helt vildt mange!
Et par eksempler:
Uncle Bob, the Space Marine
The Scholar Abbot in the Schola Progenium gave his fifth grade class an assignment: tell a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.
Corvius said, "My father was a farmer on Acheron VII and we had a lot of egg-laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the coach when we hit a bump in the road and the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess."
"And what´s the moral of the story?" asked the Scholar Abbot.
"Don´t put all your eggs in one basket!"
"Very good," said the teacher. "Now, Jorun. Tell us your story."
"MY family where farmers too. But we raised grox´ for the meat market. We had a dozen grox.eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live grox. And the moral to this story is, don´t count your grox before they´re hatched."
"That´s a fine story Jorun," he continued. "Johnny, do you have a story to share?"
"Yes sir, my daddy told me this story about my Uncle, Veteran Sargent Bob. Uncle Bob was a Space Marine in the 3rd War for Armageddon and his Thunderhawk got hit. He had to crash land in hostile ork territory and all he had was a bottle of fenrisian ale, a bolter and a chainsword. He drank the fenrisian ale on the way down so it wouldn´t break and then he landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. He killed seventy with the bolter until he ran out of bullets, then he killed twenty more with with the chainsword till the blade broke and then kill the last ten with his bare hands."
"Emperor´s Throne," said the Scholar Abbot, "What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?"
"Don´t piss off Uncle Bob when he´s been drinking."
Et udsnit af en længere en:
The (quite many) commandments of a loyal Space Marine
1. Thou shalt not refer to the Adeptus Soritas as "Bolter Bitches," nor shalt thou go anywhere near our sisters during the time of their "Red Rage," lest thou wishes to be the first human to enter orbit without the aid of a shuttle.
7. Thou shalt not make jokes about the Imperial Guard´s weapons.
8. Thou shalt not refer to the Rhino transports as "pimp wagons," nor shalt thou use the phrase, "If the Rhino be rockin, don´t come a knockin."
44. Thou shalt not have water gun fights with lasguns. (the guard needs them)
95. “It makes a funny noise” is not an excuse for punching Imperial Guardsmen.
(der er 334 af dem!)
http://forums.filefront.com/table-top-hobby-discussion/271841-warhammer-jokes.html
Der er helt vildt mange!
Et par eksempler:
Uncle Bob, the Space Marine
The Scholar Abbot in the Schola Progenium gave his fifth grade class an assignment: tell a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.
Corvius said, "My father was a farmer on Acheron VII and we had a lot of egg-laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the coach when we hit a bump in the road and the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess."
"And what´s the moral of the story?" asked the Scholar Abbot.
"Don´t put all your eggs in one basket!"
"Very good," said the teacher. "Now, Jorun. Tell us your story."
"MY family where farmers too. But we raised grox´ for the meat market. We had a dozen grox.eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live grox. And the moral to this story is, don´t count your grox before they´re hatched."
"That´s a fine story Jorun," he continued. "Johnny, do you have a story to share?"
"Yes sir, my daddy told me this story about my Uncle, Veteran Sargent Bob. Uncle Bob was a Space Marine in the 3rd War for Armageddon and his Thunderhawk got hit. He had to crash land in hostile ork territory and all he had was a bottle of fenrisian ale, a bolter and a chainsword. He drank the fenrisian ale on the way down so it wouldn´t break and then he landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. He killed seventy with the bolter until he ran out of bullets, then he killed twenty more with with the chainsword till the blade broke and then kill the last ten with his bare hands."
"Emperor´s Throne," said the Scholar Abbot, "What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?"
"Don´t piss off Uncle Bob when he´s been drinking."
Et udsnit af en længere en:
The (quite many) commandments of a loyal Space Marine
1. Thou shalt not refer to the Adeptus Soritas as "Bolter Bitches," nor shalt thou go anywhere near our sisters during the time of their "Red Rage," lest thou wishes to be the first human to enter orbit without the aid of a shuttle.
7. Thou shalt not make jokes about the Imperial Guard´s weapons.
8. Thou shalt not refer to the Rhino transports as "pimp wagons," nor shalt thou use the phrase, "If the Rhino be rockin, don´t come a knockin."
44. Thou shalt not have water gun fights with lasguns. (the guard needs them)
95. “It makes a funny noise” is not an excuse for punching Imperial Guardsmen.
(der er 334 af dem!)
Hvor er det smukt!